I finally have a consistently functioning keyboard so I will get back to writing more frequently. My last update was a couple months ago when I first switched over to bicalutamide as an antiandrogen, so I have some updates on how that’s went. I also ran a few half marathons and attempted a 5k training plan to pick up some speed if possible, so I’ve got some updates on how that’s been going as well
Hormone Therapy Update
Over the past couple of months I switch from dutasteride to bicalutamide for an anti-androgen. I’ve had one set of labs done in that time. Per the labs, not much changed for either my testosterone levels or estradiol levels. This was kind of frustrating for me, because I feel like my hormone levels have been very stubborn about changing, but I’ve been wanting to avoid using the more commonly used spironolactone because of some of its effects. Talking with my doctor though and reading some literature, bicalutamide may actually increase testosterone levels, as it is functions by blocking the androgen receptors, so it is basically floating around not being used. So while this is fine for my personal journey, it made me wonder about how this could affect athletes in sports that use testosterone levels as a guideline, which would basically eliminate bicalutamide as an option.
On the estrogen side, my estradiol levels, while higher, are still being stubborn and haven’t increased to the level my doctor and I are hoping for. So for that reason, I am switching to injectable estrogen. I have trouble with needles, so I’ve enlisted my spouse Katie to help me, at least for the first few so I can become a bit more desensitized to it.
Getting the prescription filled was a bit of a nightmare, as the local pharmacies didn’t have any in stock, so we had to go to Seattle to pick it up. Combine that with Bartell Drug’s systems being merged with Rite-Aid resulting in me not showing up in the system at some of the individual locations, just made the whole thing a lot harder than it should have been. I think we’re going to need to switch pharmacies to stop having these issues.
The first injection was a bit of a mess too, but just with trying to get the syringe set up. We watched some online videos on how to do the injections, and we knew that we had two different sets of needles, but there was one key difference that was throwing us off. The syringes I received had the injection needle already attached, so the first couple of tries we didn’t realize that it wasn’t the needle for drawing the medication out. This resulted in some difficulties in trying to draw the estradiol out since the inject needle is much thinner, and disposing the needles that we thought had issues. We were eventually able to figure out that we needed to switch thee needle out, draw the medicine, then switch the needle back again, unlike in the videos where there was no needle attached initially (which would’ve made more sense to me).
Running
Over the summer, I ran three half marathons put on by Northwest Trail Runs, a group that I really love and have volunteered for a few times. Each of the courses were similar to, but slightly different than ones I ran before. Those races were the Whidbey Woods Half Marathon (race report linked), the Paradise Valley Half Marathon, and the Summer Blast at the Redmond Watershed Half marathon. I had a lot of fun with these and felt great running them. Overall, my times were similar than what I’ve ran before. Given how much work I’ve put in to trying to speed up, the feeling I get is that the hormone therapy has been offsetting any gains. Where I did feel a difference in each of the races is how much harder running uphill has felt. So I think that’s probably where the hormone therapy has made the most noticeable difference in my running.
I also tried doing a 5k training plan to pick up some speed at running shorter distances. I just used the recommended plan from Strava for workouts, although my adherence wasn’t perfect because I struggle to get out regularly with work and the kids. With that noted, I struggled to hit my target times on any of the harder workouts. As I came up on the weekend I was planning to run my neighborhood route that’s about a 5k, I couldn’t even keep my target pace for 2 miles, so I’ve definitely lost the endurance for pushing harder over those shorter distances. What was weird was how much easier the first half mile always felt though.
So overall, I would definitely say I’m noticing the effects of the hormone therapy more on my running now. With my training, I haven’t seen losses in all parts of my running, but the higher intensity aspects are definitely more of a struggle now. Katie has started working with a running coach and I’ve been jealous of that, so I might start that up in a couple of months if everything works out. Having these observations will probably help me with some targeted workouts. I also want to run a 50k next year, where my biggest struggle getting over 15 miles has always been injuries, so hopefully a running coach can also help me work through that as well.
General Life
Speaking more generally about how all everything has been going for me with my gender journey the past couple months, I would have to say it’s been pretty solid. I’ve been feeling more femme and non-binary, not very much masculine the past couple of months. It’s been a lot of fun to feel that out. I’ve got some more women’s cut T-Shirts which has been a lot of fun for me, both for running and just going around. This never-ending pandemic reduced some of the opportunities for getting out in the community more, but I’ll take what I can get for now.
During the summer, I was briefly back in the office. I haven’t told anything directly to my team, as I’ve mentioned before, I feel agender while working, so this was fine for me. I did get a lot of positive comments about my hair which was pretty cool though. I’m back to virtual work for now, who knows when I’ll be back in the office.
I also attended my sister’s wedding in August. Having a medieval theme to it, I wore a Viking era apron dress. That was a great and fun way to express myself, and I got some great compliments from my family. It was amusing getting both the positive reactions from my family that knows me well, and seeing some of the ones just make the assumption “well that’s just what people wore in that era” not assuming the clothing was intended to be feminine. Overall, it was a lot of fun being able to express myself and running around doing all the IT-ish related work to keep the wedding running (setting up Wi-Fi out in the middle of an open field was a new one).
Fall is coming up with cooler weather, which means I’ll be getting the dogs out for more running which should be fun. I bought some new batteries for my old go pro, so hopefully I’ll be able to get some fun clips from Ullr’s view while running the trails. Cooler weather will mean I can start wearing my sweater dress again soon which I love so much. Last winter I was too nervous to wear it a lot of the time when I went out, but I’ve been feeling more confident with myself as the year has gone on.
That’s all for this update. With the working keyboard I’ll be trying to do these more often (maybe monthly?), as well as writing about more races (I’ve got the Moran Constitutional Relay coming up), as well as some more reviews.